Have you ever passed someone in the street and noticed how happy they look. Everything about them, their “vibe”, their walk, their mannerisms and obviously their beaming smile. How wonderful would it be be BE that person.

Live For The Day … But Plan Like You’re Going To Live Forever.

 

Enlightenment is holding two conflicting thoughts and still be able to function.

The Buddha

We all have this assumption that we will live until we are 100 (or at least I do) but what if that wasn’t true? What if you were only going to live another 10, 20 or even 30 years. Then what? Would you begin to live your life any different? If I was told that I was going to live only 1 more year, you can bet your last penny that I would change the way I live. I would be more spontaneous, experience life and spend more time with loved ones. So … why don’t we do that anyway? It’s that assumption again, it gives us a false sense of security.

Throughout my happiness research I have found that there are many traits a “happy” person embodies, they are:

They Give Compliments.

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There’s no better feeling than receiving a genuine compliment. So why don’t we give them out more often? Focusing on each others strengths instead of weaknesses is one step closer to happiness.

I know people who will gladly point out my weaknesses or things that aren’t quite perfect about me and it makes me feel rubbish. So, when I do received a compliment, it feels strange, kinda alien.

How wonderful would it be if we could live in a world full of loving genuine compliments!?!

They Practice Acts Of Kindness.

stencil-blog-post-image-8One thing a friend of mine taught me was the write a letter from”the universe” visit your local library or bookstore and slip it into a book so the next person who rents that book will be gifted with a loving letter. If I was to receive a random loving letter I would be so touched.

 

They Choose Their Words Carefully.

stencil-blog-post-image-9We all know the power of words. Is your glass half full or half empty?Stop complaining and negative self talk. How do you talk about other people? Just for today cut out ALL gossiping. The way I see it, if you and your friends are gossiping about another friend, then it is highly likely that the same friend will gossip to others about you. Once you cut out the gossiping, you will be SO surprised little you have to say – to some friends. This will show you the quality of your friendships and will allow you to work on them and build a deeper connection.

They Understand The Importance Of Self Care.

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Happy people understand that taking care of yourself is a high priority. How can you be there and help other people if you aren’t at full capacity? Imagine you are a cup and what is in the cup is for you, and what you offer others is in your saucer.

There is no virtue in self sacrifice.

 

10 examples of self care:

  • Moving your body – any form of exercise; dancing, swimming, hiking, running etc.
  • Walking in nature
  • Sitting out in the sun and absorbing that vitamin D
  • Taking time out to rest and reflect
  • Getting enough sleep
  • Eating healthy
  • Drinking plenty of water
  • Having a hot bath or shower
  • Meditating
  • Journaling

They Surround Themselves With Positive, Loving And Accepting People.

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Having the right tribe/community is one of the most important factors to have a happy life. Some peoples love is conditional so knowing you have that love and support no matter is very comforting. I read an article years ago about the level happiness having one good quality friendship is the equivalent of £50,000. WOWZERS.

I’m a very rich woman in that case.

They SMILE!

My favourite smile quote is:

Use your smile to change the world, don’t let the world change your smile

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The words of Nat King Coles SMILE song say it all.
“Smile though your heart is aching

Smile even though it’s breaking

When there are clouds in the sky, you’ll get by

If you smile through your fear and sorrow

Smile and maybe tomorrow

You’ll see the sun come shining through for you

Light up your face with gladness

Hide every trace of sadness

Although a tear may be ever so near

That’s the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what’s the use of crying?

You’ll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile

That’s the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what’s the use of crying?

You’ll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile”

I listened to these lyrics recently and they just resonated with me SO much. It was like WOW, that was written for me … and I’m sure you feel the same, which is why this song is such a classic.

 

They Set Boundaries & Learn To Say NO!

boundaries

Setting boundaries involves an element of self awareness.

Some people are great at setting boundaries, however other people (including myself at times) struggle to set boundaries with certain individuals. I feel it is easier to set a boundary with a stranger than it is your own family for example.
If you do not express your feelings to others, you will end up bottling that emotion up which could turn into resentment.

Just because you are asked if you could do something, it doesn’t mean you should or have to. If you have been asked to do something and you are more than capable of doing it, if it doesn’t feel emotionally “right” then listen to you own knowing and say NO.

See my Setting Boundaries, Learning To Say NO! And Avoiding The Yes Man blog. It is much more detailed and uber helpful.

 

They Look For The Lessons.

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There are lessons in everything. The good experience AND the bad ones and you can grow from each. It can be hard to see the lessons when you are deep in something but they are there. Don’t put pressure on yourself to find them, once any potential chaos or joy has passed, you will be able to see clearly and the lesson may (or may not) be super obvious.

 

They Keep A Gratitude Journal – As Well As A Regular Journal.

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Writing a gratitude journal at the end of the day (or first thing in the morning) forces you to shift your way of thinking. So  instead of focusing on the negative, you write down what you were grateful for that day.For example; today I am grateful for Liz Green and the wonderful Everyday Magical Community she has set up. I was experiencing some contrast throughout today and I am grateful that I could express how I was feeling free of judgement and I was offered love, support and guidance. You can write one thing a day you are grateful for or as many as possible. I recommend writing 3 things as that REALLY forces you to pay attention to your day without feeling overwhelmed.

See my Journal Your Way To Success …. How To Keep A Journal And How It Can Help You Grow, Heal And Flourish blog. I give more a detailed explanation and several ways you can journal. I really enjoyed writing it – ironicly. LOL.

 

Stop Looking To TV Shows for Life Advice/Guidance.

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Stop watching soaps altogether. I find watching shows like Hollyoaks, Emmerdale or Coronation Street (UK TV Shows) SO STRESSFUL. About 7 years ago, I observed how a friend of mine used to behave. She LOVED watching all the soaps and looked forward to it at the end of each day, which is great… Until she started living her life like a soap drama. If something in her life appeared to be similar to one that is happening or happened in a soap recently, she would just assume that the situation was the same and react in accordance. Sounds ridiculous right?

So, turn off the TV or change the channel and find something more uplifting – Or watch something more empowering and uplifting.

 

They Don’t Get Sucked Into Or Involved In Unnecessary Dysfunctional Drama.

Drama gives people so much significance yet is so dysfunctional.

I have walked away from many friendships over the past 4 years as I began to notice the drama that was I was somehow attracting and decided it was time to stop. You can still love and support your friends without being part of their chaotic life. Be aware that you are not forced onto their sinking ship.

Be the Lighthouse and guide people out of the darkness and into the light.

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I hope you have found this post helpful.

Comment below, I’d love to hear from you.

 

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